Healing Your Relationship with Money
Having a whole blog section on Conscious Finances feels a bit strange simply because finances, and how I make money, have always been an uncomfortable topic for me. My intention is that we can learn alongside each other. As always, I write my content as a hope of sparking an idea or providing the support you may need along your Conscious Living journey. I will never deny that I do not have it all figured out. My hope is that you can see that we are all here doing our best to find our healthier and happier way of living. So let’s do it. Let’s dive into the uncomfortable topic of money, shall we?
Over the last year and a half since my husband and I moved to a new state, we have gotten the biggest wake up call with finances. We have been given plenty of lessons around money, like you probably have, and I have recently felt the relief coming in.
We had been living with a very scarce mindset. We never felt like we could get out ahead of our finances. We never felt like we could make enough money. Having financial freedom seemed far out of our reach. Making money was an urgent thing if we were going to make things happen. Burning the candle at both ends of the stick was necessary if we wanted to reach our goals.
Yet we were left with a whole lot of stress and tension in our lives because of money. We didn’t spend our money wisely because we weren’t quite sure how to. We hadn’t created a budget that worked for us yet. We thankfully stumbled our way onto a different path to start trending our relationship with money in a more productive way. It all started with a book.
It’s Not your Money by Tosha Silver.
Now, you may feel like this is “woowoo”. This book is night and day different from anything I’ve learned about money. The way she helps you desire your brain to think about money in a new way will push you way out of your comfort zone.
The first time I read this book I thought “there’s no way” many times. My husband was a lot better at diving into this new way of thinking than I was (he’s braver at taking a leap of faith). Yet, time and time again, I fell flat on my face with stress and anxiety around our finances. I would be in tears and lost as to what we could do to make things work. Every time, my husband asked if I had been trying anything from the book. Of course, I hadn’t. I was very resistant.
I’m sure you can guess what happened next… I started to loosen the grip and became more open to trying something different. I have this thing about being in control. Being in control has always made me feel safe. So this new way of thinking and releasing control seemed careless.
Working through the practices in this book helped me ease into life. By letting go and free falling from time to time, I’ve started being braver about taking the leap. I’ve gotten more comfortable with trial and error. I’ve detached myself from expecting a specific outcome.
My husband and I agreed that we did not want to work our lives away just to make money. We want to enjoy our lives and soak in time with our littles. We have failed many times along the way but after reading this book, our approach towards money has changed drastically. The part that’s the sweetest reward, things are trending in an amazing way compared to where we were when we took a leap of faith to move to a new state.
If you’re ready to redesign your outlook on money, I cannot recommend that book enough. Even if you only pull a couple things from it, it will be worth your time. (We both have actually been through it a few times now). Would love to hear your thoughts if you do read it.
